Lavant Vs Chidham 30th July 2026

It’s the final countdown, as ‘Europe’ very aptly described in their one hit wonder. But Lavant are definitely NOT a one hit wonder. More details to follow in the report, so read on. 

At the start of the week, the anticipation for the final mid week game was rising. The skipper initially had 13 names to choose from. Finding a team for the mid week has never really been a problem…..until the dreaded school holidays.  Dropping down to 9 players at 10pm the night before the match, every number in the Lavant What’s app group was analysed with a fine tooth comb, but step up to the plate, our injured Sunday skipper, meniscus tear and all, followed by a 10:30 pm SOS text to Super Stevie Brooker, returning by train from Paris.  This is testimony to the commitment of our club members. Through thick and thin, as the Rembrandts used to say ‘ I’ll be there for you’. 

Inspecting the pitch, it was used, hard and dusty. The heavy roller was deployed. (Keep rolling, rolling rolling , ‘limp bizqit) T-Rex was visibly jealous of the resources available to  the ground facilities. 

Once again, like Beck, the skipper failed miserably with the toss. ‘Im a loser baby, so why don’t you kill me’. 

The skipper opened up with his new superstar bowler ‘Kier premiere’. His first over was impressive knocking over the openers stumps. Ben was marvelling from deep fine leg, how much it had moved off the pitch. On the other end, Will T was like a fiery dragon, after seeing the heavy roller, ripped the ball down, like Brett Lee. However, the Chidham Number 3 had other thoughts, mooing shots to cow corner with gay abandon. 

Kier struck again with another off cutter toppling the other opener. ‘Another one bites the dust’. 

Kiers celebration fist pump would have definitely knocked out Useyk. Others likened it to a Ken or Ryu’s uppercut from street fighter.  He will go down this season as the best celebratory gesture. Back to the game. The opposition 3 continued to play aggressively and Andy was put to work in the deep chasing hard. At 52-2 off 6 overs, there was a double change. The overseas and Ben ‘the steam engine’ Campbell were to stem the flow. Jean Claude had immediate impact with the first ball. Clean bowled. This meant the opposition skipper ‘prof’ was sent into bat. A defensive stroke, dot ball, dot ball, Tran’s fourth ball was caressed through the covers, then stopped Dawson (newbie). The final ball of the over was a slightly wider tempter on the off stump. Profs eyes lit up and a faint edge to Steve ‘the glove man’ Cox.  The skipper decided a double wicket maiden was not good enough, so it was one and done. 

Ben C bowled with pace and economy. No boundaries conceded. A 2 over spell, 0-10 off 2. The chairman, leading by example, as he always does, bowled 4 overs of guile and wit. A miserly 15 off 4 overs off the dreaded middle overs. Less than 4 RPO. Well done.

Another bowling change and it was time to unleash the Trebuchet Stevie B. There were rumours that he was in France, inspecting other medieval Warfare to improve his slingshot technique, and once again, his class shone through. The opposition struggled to put him away. Just 2, 5 and 1 off  of the first 3 overs. It must be mentioned, the commitment in the field was second to none. The outfield was lightening and so were the outfielders. Messi and Haaland would have been proud of the footwork. Shout out to Murray and Brooker. With their fancy footwork. Maybe they need to be included in the English National Squad.  A debut bowling opportunity arose for Dawson, having not bowled for his league team in years. The opposition were treading water, as the run rate was slowing and decided to ramp Dawson. Unluckily for them, Ben C was lurking like a gator in the Florida Everglades and gobbled it up. 

A debut wicket for Dawson and he finished 1-5 off 2. (Also a maiden in the 19th over)  Steve completed his 4 over spell. 0-13 off 4. Chidham had tipped over the triple figure mark at 101-5.

Would this be enough? Only time would tell. 

Sent into bat was the Injured (for one night only) Iain Blow and Dawson . The opening bowlers for Chidham used the bounce and home advantage well, bowling good variations of pace and bounce. Lots of 1s and 2s and a few boundaries in between, and Lavant were going at 5 RPO. A special mention for Iain, knee injury and all, filling the opening role. 

During the game, at one point, one ball bounced up viciously at Dawson, caught the edge and deflected to the boundary. It didn’t look easy out there. Runs were hard to come by. It felt like the Sahara desert, literally.  Dawsons stumps were rattled for a hard fought 9 and Iain valiantly fought for a well earned  23. The skipper was ready to pull the emergency button, and unleash the animal TRex for fireworks and send himself into bat to finish the game like he did on the previous Sunday. The conversation with Steve, before the match, was to be an anchor role. However this was not the Stevie Brooker way. Beginning the innings was like Will T put it,  ‘a Matisse.’ A work of art. Stoke play of the highest order. On the other end, growing in confidence, (maybe he is 6 foot 7 now) was Andy Richardson. It was like a giant kangaroo hopping down the pitch, able to turn a good length, into a full toss. Bludgeoning his way to the boundary, he hop, skipped and jumped his way down the pitch multiple occasions. Maybe he was a former athletics competitor in his youth? Or the hopscotch king in the playground, who knows? In between was some sublime running between the wickets between the pair of them.  4 giant strides and he was at the other end. No one could run him out. 

Stevie B cut , pulled, drove and flicked. His wagon wheel was 360. The man of the moment retired on 35 not out from 15 balls. Andy R retiring on 27 from 23 balls to take the game away from a precarious situation. The writing was on the wall. 

Steve Cox hit 2 From 1 ball and Ben C hit the winning runs. From 43-2 off 10 to winning the game with 3 overs and 5 balls and 8 wickets left to spare. Another convincing win. Cue song ‘ We are the champions, my friend’s’ 

The night ended with a meal at the Berkeley Arms. A beautiful summer’s evening, noodle stir-fry, (a little bit spicy) drinks and a de-brief of the game and season. 

Champagne moment:

Kiers celebration wickets

Men of the Match

Andy and Stevie B, taking control of the match 

Umpire of the match 

Justin

Team of the match 

Lavant Loons

The team ethos and morale remain high, as the season wound down to  

It’s final match. Great memories, fun times and amazing people. It’s never a burden to skipper such a talented, motley crew. Everyone gives 100% Percent at all times. 

Every misfield, dropped catch or missed opportunity is always followed up by a ‘never mind” or ‘next time’ An attitude that is always recieved with gratitude. We always want to win, but don’t always,  not through lack of trying.  It is ….in the end….. village cricket. As the famous quote says ‘It takes a village to raise a child, no….it takes Lavant village to get the best out of the Loons. 

Well done everyone!